More Antifelinism


Don’t marry a woman who likes cats but does not like dogs.  You may marry a woman who doesn’t like either, or whose reason for not liking dogs is that one of them bit her when she was a toddler.  But a woman who likes cats but does not like dogs will be a Joan Crawford or Jane Wyman.  Ronald Reagan married Jane Wyman, and look how sorry he was about that.

An excerpt from Professor Anthony Esolen’s rules for marriage.  I won’t attribute to him my view on cats, but I have to agree with his rule, and with his other practical admissions on the real differences between men and women.

Hat tip to Other Mary.

13 thoughts on “More Antifelinism

  1. So who’s Prof. Whats-his-name anyway??? For all we know, he’s been married and divorced a dozen times and has NO clue about finding a good woman. (Granted I didn’t read the links you gave about him because ….)

    Father Angelo, I think it’s safe to say that you have a deep scar from your distant past that is being expressed in your blogs. There are some wonderful psychologists to help you with your phobias … we can all put our heads together and help you out here. Until then, I think we need to put the friary cats under lock and key … the cats clearly are not safe there! Poor things.

  2. Jen,

    Do the reading you have admittedly neglected to do. There is more wisdom here than you think.

    No cat is forced to live here. The evil things go where they will and have no attachment whatsoever to place or person. I am not scarred.

  3. Pingback: A Subtle Dragon « Mary Victrix

  4. Well, I must first shout out a humble, “MEA CULPA”. I have read the links. Prof. Whats-his-name, eh-hem, Esolen, is quite an impressive writer and philosopher for that matter. In fact, I will further humbly admit that some of his writings are way over my head.

    However, our marriage must be a miraculous one since I really hate dogs but do love kitties … we’re heading on year 23 this coming June. (Although, I do happen to be someone who was bitten by a few dogs as a child so my disdain for dogs is PARTIALLY due to that.) Joan Crawford or Jane Wyman. Hmph.

  5. Oh, and ONE more thing! From the Touchstone website you led us all to … I snatched this little gem from SM Hutchens:

    From Looking at Old Family Pictures: Dogs and Cats
    The reason, I suppose, that I tend to dislike dogs is that most of them have had the discrimination bred out of them, a trait that is amplified in becoming a pet; they are either everyone’s friend or everyone’s enemy. I am all for them when they are domesticated to some useful purpose like herding or the service of the blind, but as pets, especially when inadequately trained by masters who allow them to deport in human company as if they were something more than animals, I can happily do without them. I grew up with an excellent dog, a collie bitch who was trained, discriminating, and knew her place. She bears primary responsibility for the ambivalence I have had toward dogs since her departure. I can’t say, “I don’t like dogs,” but chances are about four out of five that I don’t like yours.

    Cats I can tolerate with more equanimity. Highly predictable models of self-regard and refined appetite, they know exactly what they want from human beings, and once they are given or refused it, tend to go away and mind their own business. They are self-cleaning, don’t fancy carrion, pursue skunks, or find decaying trash irresistible, and usually don’t bother the neighbors unless they are bird-watchers (in my experience, Darwinians who believe in the survival of the fittest as an article of faith–as long as it doesn’t involve cats killing birds). There is also the chance, at least where I live, that a peripatetic cat will be killed and eaten by a hawk, owl, or coyote. This gives them a modicum of humility in the face of nature that is hardly ever seen in pet dogs, and humility is a most pleasing virtue, especially in royalty.

  6. I happen to be the other half of the 23 year union with Jen. And not that I want to go public with too many details but I admit that I gave her a kitten shortly after matrimony but I had no idea that it would mean a life without a dog! Perhaps I’m in the doghouse now….but I have suffered through fish, hamsters, a rabbit, more fish but non of these critters have anything to offer what a man’sbest friend could except cost and clean up.

  7. Serge – A shameless plug. Since you’re already in the doghouse anyway, we have Golden Retriever pups ready to go now. I’ll give you a deal…

  8. Oh,puhlease. Here’s the BIGGEST issue of *man’s* best friend. Who shoulders the responsibility of feeding, taking to the vet and picking up *droppings* in the yard when children are playing???? Is it the dog’s best friend??? No sirree Bob. And who vacuums the fur from around the house???? Every woman I have spoken with has warned me NOT to get the furry friend. It will be another thing for me to manage. Kitty’s manage themselves … dogs do not.

    And … our kitty, Sophie, was loved by ALL in the house!! 😉 Nuff said. (Now I’ll be in the doghouse.)

  9. Here’s an idea: Wait until some of your kids are old enough to feed, brush and pick up after (if you know what I mean) a furry friend of the canine variety, and insist that they agree to be central to the animal’s care prior to procuring a pooch. (most parents make this “vow” a part of the deal, however, many fail to enforce it after a spell) This tact worked well for us. The kids do most of the “heavy lifting” and the dog has been a great addition to the family.
    Bonus: The dog makes a great domestic helper. Any toddler snack droppin’s that make the floor magically disappear! A reasonable trade-off for the additional sweeping or vaccuming of fur!

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